blog may 21, 2026 - blog thoughts
Ugh. Just realised that the thing I was waiting for was an hour later than I thought it was. So, I guess I got another 45 minutes to kill. I wish I wasn't so tired, or else I'd have something more insightful to say. Guess I'll just ruminate on the site some more. I do think that this is a better place than the homepage for these kinds of longform posts, but at the same time, I don't want this page itself to get too cluttered. Maybe this will just be an index with dates and topics, and they'll all link to their own post. Yeah, I like that.Ok, this is on its own page now. Cool. I wish I knew how to indent paragraphs. When I was coding my old site, I tried to do indents by just pasting a bunch of blank characters at the start. That seemed to work initially, but because everything was justified, that meant that the blank characters were stretched to different lengths, meaning that the indents were all uneven. Imagine me shivering, because that's what I did in real life. Text formatting is tedious but it's absolutely worth it. Like I said, I have a very strong aesthetic sensibility.
Christ in heaven I'm tired. Life has been insanely busy for me recently, and there probably isn't a worse time for me to be doing something like this, but hey, that's never stopped me before. I've kind of always been the type of person that does best under insane pressure. Not that it's exactly healthy for me, of course not. But if I have a deadline, sufficient caffeine, and an alarming sleep defecit, then a masterpiece is all but guaranteed. I think I saw a tumblr post a few months back that said something along the lines of "I would never give up my autism but I'd get rid of my ADHD in a heartbeat", and while I'm not sure I completely agree... well. I wish I was more consistent in the things that I pursue. Nothing I can do about it, I guess. I mean, adderall's been a fucking godsend in some departments. But it's not a cure-all. I've been writer's blocked for I think a month and a half(?) now, and I'm a little scared that I'm just not going to be able to write for the next few years. That's how these things tend to go. I've been focusing on other hobbies (music mostly), and it's not until something else runs its course for a year or two that I get the opportunity to switch. Sigh.
Maybe I shouldn't be so down. My second novel turned out to be a bit of a trainwreck, and maybe I just needed to recover from that, and editing it is too intimidating right now. A friend offered to beta read it, and I do want that, but I feel like I just want to move onto something new. I told him my plan for the sequel to my first novel (which I dropped for being too ambitious), and he expressed great interest in helping me straighten it out, but he's not the kind of person with a lot of free time, so I'm not expecting that to actually come to fruition. Especially since I'm going to be so busy over the coming... who knows how long. I mean, I've already burned out of pixel art, so I guess I don't feel super bad just letting sleeping dogs lie while I wait for my life to calm down.
Some reminder notes for myself:
Under misc. make sure to include AMVs and bookbinding stuff